A glance into her mind - Zethrion's blood

She suddenly sprung up from her sleep, gasping for breath and cold sweat covering her body.

‘What... what was that?" She slowly looked around herself and let out a sigh of relief. A dream... it was only... a dream... but why would...’

She looked down and nearly froze as she noticed something strange. She held her hands in front of herself to take a better look at all the dried bloodstains on her hands...

‘No... this is... No! I have killed many throughout my life... I did what I had to do... Yet, why... why does it feel so... What is this? Regret? And for a Stygian! No, it can not be... No... This had to be done! He... He was trying to hurt my... my family...’

***

"Think, Nashara... Think... I bumped into him in Tarantia...I just exchanged a few words with Meos... And then I met him... again. Zethrion. I still can not understand... I do not understand him... but more than that, I can not understand myself! Why did I stop... And talk to him... Why did he help me... Why... Why did he keep saying that he would help me, if I asked him? ...

'Because you are like me' he said... Hah! As if I would have anything in common with that filthy Stygian! Yet...’

I finally decided to ask him... what would it be that made me like him... There would be nothing, of course, but I wanted to know why he thinks so...

Why did he take me to that strange room? We always talked outside, wherever it was... why did he take me there... No... the real question is... Why did I follow him!

What is he doing...? He took off his robe... why? Something about powers within the robe, he says... Perhaps... what do I know of that cursed magic, anyway...

He said he knows... me... He believes I have been hurt... That I feel hollow inside... That I try to keep everyone out... That I feel alone... even when I am around a hundred people... Like him? Is that what I feel? I... I never gave any thought to this... No! It is not the time to start thinking about it now! What is done is done! There is no going back...

That was of no importance! His main goal was still Tyrnan! And he was ready to hurt everyone to get to him... That cursed snake...

I told him to leave them alone! He held my life in his hands... Why would he need the others? My chest... froze... Literally... his hand was cold as ice... I... It was so painful... I screamed... and collapsed to the ground... my chest armour shattered... 'What is he doing' was screaming through my mind... 'is this... the end? Am I of no use, after all?'

He put a robe on me and threw my freezing, shaking body on a bed... I.. I felt so weak... and humiliated... And... Exhausted... I barely had any sleep since those cursed things started eating me from the inside... Wait... It was gone? The pain... was gone...

'They would only awaken if you attack me' he said. What? Why would he....

He said he got tired of me saying that he holds my life! But that... that means he was now ready to hurt the others! He would hurt everyone just to get to Tyrnan! No... I could not let him do it...

He was standing beside the bed I was sitting on... I told him I would not let him hurt anyone... He.. dropped a dagger on the bed? What is he planning?

'Strike me down now if you think I am unfair and evil' he said. Is he an idiot? I grabbed the dagger and just kept staring at it...

My mind was so confused... I had a hard time focusing on his words... and even harder focusing on my own! I was simply staring and the dagger...

No... I did not believe he was evil... he was... fair... in a way... His methods were horrible, but... Indeed, it was true... he never lied to me...

No matter! His reasons, his ways, his race or his dark powers... None of that mattered to me at the time...

Wait! I could not kill him! That bastard... if I killed him, his men would have slaughtered us all! Hunted us down to the last one like animals! No... Of course... He would never expose himself like this if he did not have something that would hold me back from killing him...

He summoned one of his minions? What the-

'Carry this message to the keep.' he said... that... filthy beast... left on his command. What was that?

'My men are to stand down, they are not to harm any of your clan' he said.

Was he actually trying to make me kill him? If I attack him, the parasites would awaken and kill me in a matter of days... maybe hours... But everyone else will be safe! Everyone will be safe from his foul magic!

He was insulting Tyrnan... No, Tyrnan is not that kind of man... he would never hire an assassin to kill Zethrion... Tyrnan is not that stupid as to bring more enemies into this war! No matter...

I told him I did not care if he was evil or not... nor did I care for his reasons... The only thing that mattered... He was intent on hurting them... hurting my family... But he... he helped me... He kept me alive... He saved Maelthe when I asked him... He told me the names of those who were after Myrtis... not all of them, but still... Did he really just want to help me because I sometimes needed help... Because I was... like him? He said he likes my spirit... ENOUGH! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! My mind was screaming...

I tightened the grip on the dagger... and lunged it straight into his stomach... The blood... The blood started to flow from the wound... on my hands... on the bed... on the floor... He fell on his knees...

Blood? This was Zethrion... he was really ready to die? Because I wanted it to be so? I... I was sure it was an illusion... I was sure he was planning something... Why did he just let me stab him?

I... Have I become a simple murderer? I killed a man who was standing in front of me, defenceless, unarmed... I was not a warrior... I was a murderer! But... I did what I had to do... to save them... right? Right?!

He dropped to the ground... he was lying on the ground... bleeding... coughing blood... choking on his own blood... How could that be? I was so confused... I am still confused...

He said he did something he was not supposed to... by saving Maelthe when I asked him... what did he mean? Why did he do what I asked, if he was not supposed to... He hoped saving her was not a mistake, that she would make a change... for the better? For the future... What...

His men would still try to get Tyrnan! That was not what he promised! He said everyone would be safe! Did I save the family, but doomed our father? No... No, it can not be... I killed my father once... Did I just kill my father... again? What am I to do...? I... I must tell someone... I must find Tyrnan... I made a horrible mess!

Zethrion's men would still believe that Tyrnan was the one who sent that assassin!

I felt the pain coming back... The taste of my own blood in my mouth... They have awakened... I... I must tell them... before I die...

I felt a more distinct pain in my chest. Zethrion's hand... wait... What? He... He cured me? I killed him and before his death... he cured me? This is so confusing! I... I tried to tell Zethrion that Tyrnan would never send an assassin after his life! Tyrnan is not stupid, he is an honorable warrior, and a reasonable man! But Zethrion... He would not listen to my words... I had to do this!

But did I really put Tyrnan's life in danger? What was I to do?

'Ask me to live, and I shall. But I will not do so unless you really wish for it' he said. Again? Again, he would do what I ask of him? What did he want! Why was he doing this!

I told him that I could not let him hurt my family... He would never give up on that... and in that case... I did not want him to live... It was his fault! Maelthe got hurt... Sarai got hurt... Caspian... Myrtis... Everyone, I would never let him strike again!

He found it hard to believe Tyrnan would try to assassinate him. Then why... why did he not believe me, when I said that Tyrnan would never...

'I was wrong. You are the second assassin he sent... He knew of your fear of losing your family, and he used you to kill me. I was tricked... How could I not have seen this?'

Those were his words. Me... an assassin? No... that is impossible... Tyrnan... No, that can not be true! I never told Tyrnan about my family! But... did he find out? How... No! NO! This is not true!

He groaned in pain as he pulled the dagger out of his stomach. His breathing stopped. His body was lying still.

Zethrion... It did not have to end like this... It was not supposed to end like this!

He... perhaps he was not so bad... Even if his methods were cruel and ruthless... He was doing what he believed was right... And so was I...

I... I killed a man who helped me! Just like Nasher... Nasher saved my life... and I repaid him by... killing him... Will I... Will I always kill those who help me? No... I...

I left that place... I stopped briefly by the well in front of the trade post... A stranger in a hood and a robe approached me... I did not notice him until I heard his voice saying...

'Thank you for speeding things up. I hope his death pleased you'.

His death? Speeding things up? What... what does that mean? Who was this? How... how did he know?! I... I just collapsed at the temple of Mitra and fell asleep...


The following article actually happened live but is from the soul account of the owner and as a result may or may not be a accurate representation of events. However details and emotions described above are all in keeping with the owner’s character and how they perceived the progression of events unfold.

Story written by Nashara, Clan Fearghal
www.clanfearghal.com